Friday, December 23, 2005

Xmas Xpectations

This year I'm noticing more people than usual in my circle of acquaintance who don't have "typical" Christmas plans (family, tree, presents). Some of them don't celebrate Christmas, some of them don't have family in the area, some are just kind of disconnected from people right now. I bet it's a really difficult time of year if you're in that situation. Everyone else is running around shopping, making plans, with the knowledge that they have a warm safe default refuge to be in on Christmas Day, saying bland soccer-mom things like, "And what are you doing for Christmas?"

It's not anyone's fault that they don't have a family to go to, but the assumption that everyone does must be tough. You say things like "I'm getting together with a few friends on that day," and it's implied but not said, "And that's fine, that's what I want to do, I don't mind that I don't have a family to go to." And you probably don't actually mind, but you do mind the expectation that you should have more, and that it's somehow sad that you don't. If everyone else would stop implying and assuming and questioning, it would probably be fine.

Anyway, I'm lucky I guess that I do have a family to go to. I can't wait until the office closes this afternoon so I can get home to them. As a kid growing up, I always thought Christmas was hands-down the best day of the year, and not just because of the gifts. I always loved the decorations around town, the way people were moved by "holiday spirit" to make little gestures of kindness. And I loved spending the whole day with my family, all of us together in one room with no other commitments but one another all day.

Happy holidays to all folks - with families and without. May you all have love in your lives.

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