Ahoy, Hola, and Aloha One Last Time

I always wonder when a blog I've been following doesn't get updated... for weeks... then months... what happened to the person? Why did they stop writing? Are they writing in a new blog somewhere else? What's going on in their life?

Now my own blog is one of those mysteries. Not so mysterious, really. I stopped writing because I didn't think anyone was reading it. I was weird and protective of this blog anyway and didn't tell any of my real-life friends about it. For some reason I only wanted people I didn't know to read about my life - but I wanted a whole lot of them, an outpouring of interest and support from a vast anonymous slice of humanity. I think that was too much to expect when my life is not that fascinating. And when I'm too nervous about privacy issues to post any pictures.

I think I started writing to express some of my sadness and insecurities. At the time they had to do with my relationship and my career, such as it was. Later on I was all mopey about being infertile. A blog is therapeutic in the sense that writing down a problem can often bring the solution into focus. But it's not a good way to get sympathy from the world at large. I only realized that that's what I wanted after I stopped writing.

I'm in a better place now, as maybe my last post indicates. I was grateful at the time I wrote it for more than just the things I mentioned. I was afraid to mention it and jinx myself, but I was incredibly thankful because I was pregnant again. I needed a lot of help to get to that point. Luckily I got that help, and I have a wonderful baby now.

So this is Erin signing off - not exactly 'mission complete,' because relationships and families are works in progress, and let's not even talk about the career right now - but at least 'mission under control.' And 'mission moving to alternate forms of expression for now.'

Thanks for reading. :)